I am no big fan of confessions. If I haven’t done it so far, there is no reason I am going to do one now. But rules are rules right! When it comes to secrets I always remember the dialogue that Old Rose says in Titanic “A woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets.”I may or may not have secrets; If I do I am taking them with me to the grave. So I am not going to confess anything that is going to turn my world upside down. (I may actually not have any too, but I like to keep it mystique). Mostly I am an open book, who prefers to choose truth over dares any day. I spent an entire day thinking what I should confess about, I got nothing.
There is one thing though which a couple of people in my life may already know about. It isn't a confession, because it isn't like I want to keep it hidden. It’s merely admittance of someone I once used to be. I may have been a bit of a snob in my formative years. Not because of any other reason, but I preferred to stick to people who I thought are like me. That is human tendency right? Birds of the same feather flock together. But today I feel bad when I realize I don’t recall names of most of my classmates. Trust me you don’t want to be there. That awkward moment when a classmate walks up to you and waves and you look behind you to make sure he isn't talking to someone else. Yeah,Embarrassing. And then at college, I was no better. For most part of my college I thought this is no place for me. I kept wondering every morning why I left city to come and learn at a village like this. (Tagorians, if you are reading, please don’t hate me. It was a long time ago!) I was uptight, judgmental and too shallow. Don’t imagine me as one of those characters in mean girls, things weren't so bad.It's not like I was the hottest chick in the block or the richest one too who thought little about everyone else. I just had a few reservations about certain people and didn't make an effort to know them.
But a lot has changed since then. College was the place that it all changed. And post college at work. I met a lot of people from all walks of life and made some great friends who have broken a lot of fallacy I had about them. A wider exposure to life has changed my outlook, in a positive way. I gathered life isn't to live superficially but to embrace everyone, or at least to give it a chance. I understood that we don’t have to be opinionated about people all the time, we could be wrong. Like they say don’t judge a book by its cover. A person shouldn't be judged by his background or appearance and sometimes not even by his actions. We don’t know what the circumstances must have been. I am happy I not a snobbish person who throws a lot of attitude, though my husband feels at times that version of me surfaces. Well change doesn't happen overnight. I am a better person today, trying to be better with each day that passes.
Finally the challenge is over! Phew. A few of my friends who have been following have been kind enough to appreciate my writings and I thank each one of you for it. It meant a lot to me and has kept me going to finish this. Thanks again!